The term self-care gets bandied around a lot. I too am guilty of talking about self-care, and have written a few previous posts about self-care for mothers and why it’s valuable and necessary. And whilst it’s a concept with increasing usage, that doesn’t diminish it’s importance.
Self-care is especially important when we are going through a time of significant change. Whether the change was wanted or unwanted, the need for self-care and self-compassion at these times is crucial.
However, when we are not experiencing significant transition, self-care and making time for what that entails, can feel like effort we cannot justify. As busy mothers we can find lit self-care is a low priority. One of our most popular excuse is we just don’t have time. However, daily self-care need not require a large time commitment.
Learn how to manage your heightened emotions at Christmas time in this guest post by Intuitive Coach Laurelle Wishart.
Ho ho ho! Christmas is really close now. Can you feel it? The air feels supercharged, with people racing to get things done, buy final bits and pieces, finish up at work, make last-minute arrangements and attend family dinners, presentations, celebrations and endless ‘occasions’.
Christmas is an emotional time, there’s no getting around it. And if you’ve experienced a significant loss in your life, so many moments this time of year can trigger sadness and grief – the conversations with loved ones and strangers, the music, food, smells and memories that seamlessly and sometimes painfully bring the past into the present.
As mothers, self-love and self-care are a necessity, as beautifully explained in this guest post by Olga Dossa.
Our children become who we are, not what we tell them to be.
I experienced this most clearly than when my mother unexpectedly died 10 years ago.
As adults, we know that there will be days when things go wrong. The bus is late, the kids are naughty, you spill your coffee, the dog vomits on the carpet and so on. Knowing this and accepting that these days (or nights) will occur is part of life.
But we can protect ourselves from further challenges by being prepared. Not prepared to fail, but prepared to be successful even when things are not going so well.
And the key? Being organised.
When we lost our son I was told by many people, “Be kind to yourself”. I would nod, but deep down had no idea what this really meant. No-one explained it to me and I didn’t ask. I assumed it was just something I was meant to implicitly know.
It was only years later when I finally realised what being kind to yourself meant – it was about self-care.
Recently, I had a double ‘a-ha’ moment, realising that;
- I have a lifetime habit of writing, that I was unaware of, and
- I think differently depending whether I am writing by hand, typing or dictating.
This insight got me thinking about when I write, why and for what purpose.
You’ve probably heard the advice, “dress for success”. Or, perhaps you’ve heard or were told, “dress for the job you want to have, not the one you do have”?
Well, what about when we are perfectly happy with the job we have but need or want to feel a certain way?
We all want to a live a life filled with joyful moments. We seek joy in relationships, experiences, moments and even belongings.
So what if I told you there is a simple, effective and free way we can have more joy in our daily lives? Interested?
As busy women who are juggling work, managing a household, a partner, children and the umpteen other things we try to keep on top of, it is often hard to accept that things might be easier if we just asked for help.
Asking for help feels like admitting failure for many of us. We feel that we should be wonder-woman or super-mum, who has got everything sorted and everything organised and is kicking goals all over the place.
But there are times when asking for and accepting help can make all the difference in terms of our well-being, self-care and our relationships.
When my youngest son was approaching one year old he was struggling with getting to and staying sleep at night. As a result I was getting little to no sleep every night. I’m sure other new mothers have been there too, right?!
I was desperate and finally got an appointment for a referral to sleep school for my baby. The day of the appointment came and I was feeling tired, haggard and run down. To give me the energy to get through the day, I put on a nice top, a red coat (it was winter) and some lipstick.
I bumped into a friend on the way home from the school run and as we chatted, I mentioned my desperation and appointment. Her response was immediate and firm. “Go home, wipe that lipstick off and remove the coat! You look way too well put together for anyone to believe you are struggling with lack of sleep!!”