When we lose a baby, it’s not just us who experience grief and mourn. Those around us, our parents, our siblings and any children we already have, also all grieve.
Of course, we know this, but it can be very hard to recall when we are consumed by our own loss and the associated pain.
The love of words, and particularly the love of a good quote has been with me nearly all my life. Ever since I was a young girl, words and their meanings engaged my attention.
It was as a teenager that quotes really started to resonate with me, and I started actively seeking out, reading, writing and noting down the pithy little statements! Some quotes were amusing, some profound, some were particularly apt at the time, and some I just loved for no reason I could articulate – I just did.
There are valuable upsides in allowing ourselves to experience feeling sad and the so-called negative emotions.
Over the past couple of decades, there has been an increased labelling of emotions as positive and negative. As part of this, sadness has been seen as a negative, and something to be avoided at all costs. And, happiness is seen as a positive emotion, and one we are all striving to achieve. But, in order to live balanced, well-adjusted lives, we need to experience both emotions.
It’s almost February. Which I am sure for some people means they are well-established and well-underway taking action toward achieving their plans and goals for this year.
But, I’d hazard a guess that for a good proportion of working mothers, this is not the case. Yes, really.
As women, whether we are working or not, mothers or not, grieving or not, we can often find ourselves with a sense of overwhelm. Generally, our society expects us to be wonder-women; to do everything with style and grace, and of course, with a smile.
But so often this sense of expectation leads to overwhelm, burnout and resentment.
What if it was Okay for us to simply say no?
A few days ago I read a post by a fellow life coach, who was predicting that creativity would be a big theme this year. I noted this with interest, and yet also felt like it was a not really news. You see creativity, the need for creative expression and allowing space for creativity in my life has been a constant since I was a child; it’s a lifelong theme, not just something for this year.
Creativity has been my comfort and go-to approach at many times of my life, but it really came into its own when we lost our son.
When we change our habits and routines, or take a break and leave town, almost magically, the way we experience time feels different too. It feels slower, and more memorable. We recall in more detail what we did, who we saw, what we ate; our lives feel more interesting.
Knowing this, and using this to our advantage can assist with coping when we have experienced loss.
Got a dream? A big, slightly scary dream that fills you with equal parts excitement and fear?
You’re completely forgiven if you don’t, as right now, with the excitement of the New Year there is rather a lot of hype around the latest diets, health plans, make-overs and the like. Dreams mostly don’t get a mention.
Instead at this time of year, we are inundated with articles, posts and advertisements promising that if we just follow a certain program, or steps we will change our life, and will look and feel fabulous too!
But what about those dreams? Where do they come into it?
Learn how to manage your heightened emotions at Christmas time in this guest post by Intuitive Coach Laurelle Wishart.
Ho ho ho! Christmas is really close now. Can you feel it? The air feels supercharged, with people racing to get things done, buy final bits and pieces, finish up at work, make last-minute arrangements and attend family dinners, presentations, celebrations and endless ‘occasions’.
Christmas is an emotional time, there’s no getting around it. And if you’ve experienced a significant loss in your life, so many moments this time of year can trigger sadness and grief – the conversations with loved ones and strangers, the music, food, smells and memories that seamlessly and sometimes painfully bring the past into the present.
As working mothers, school holidays and this time of year can bring mixed emotions. We are excited to spend time with our children, and looking forward to the change in routine. But we may also be facing a number of weeks where we need to continue to work, whilst our children are not at school.